Are you afraid of change?
Have you seen the stress scale? It’s a list of life events that contribute to stress. Among other things, it includes:
- marriage
- vacation
- Christmas
- pregnancy
- revision of personal habits
Notice any similarities there? These are life events that come with some kind of change. But they’re all POSITIVE changes! Unless you hate Christmas.
Even when a change is positive, it requires adjustments to how you live your daily life. These adjustments cause stress. There’s also uncertainty about what the future holds, and that frightens us.
When I talk to people about making significant life change, I often see a hesitation in their eyes. Over time, I’ve come to learn that it’s fear. And the most common fear is…
Failure.
People are afraid of failure. When I tell them about tips that have changed many people’s lives, they often get excited, but then back off, because that fear of failure comes creeping in. This is especially true when it’s something that other people have had success with. “If she can do it, but I FAIL at it, it’ll show what a failure I am…”
Do you ever catch yourself thinking this way? See how that dialogue instantly shuts down your chances of success? You can’t even try to succeed if you immediately focus on the possibility of failure! Why do we automatically disqualify ourselves from making life changes like this?
Probably because we remember our past failures. We don’t want those repeated.
Deal With Fear By Focussing on Your Successes
That’s why I tell people to focus on their successes. Think of a time when you needed to make a life change, and did. Having a hard time thinking of one? If you’re like me you’re dismissing things as they come to mind… “oh that doesn’t count cause I was helped by this situation…”
No, it counts. Give yourself some credit.
Focus on how it felt to make a successful life change. Remember the positives that came from it.
Accept the Inevitability of Change
The world is always changing. Your life will need to change in order to keep up. Your situations change, your body changes, and if you don’t change to keep up, things are going to stop working.
In that way, you’re like a computer. Everybody else is updating their programs. Without regular updates, your computer grows vulnerable to viruses and stops working together with other computers. It’s inevitable.
Stress will accompany that change. Accept the inevitability of that stress, and allow yourself to experience it, while focusing on the positive that will happen. The more you can do that, the more successful you will be at handling life’s changes.
It’s all part of the necessary process of tuning up your life for its maximum potential!
What are some ways that fear of change has held you back from improving your life? What are some countering examples where you HAVE made a life change? Focus on the latter!
I’d love to hear your examples in the comments!
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